9

 In a zeppelin or a blimp, so it seems by the shape of the compartment and the view out the windows, and we're flying over the ocean. Some kind of rescue operation going on; helicopters landing on aircraft carriers and two other blimps flying gracefully in the bright, clear air. Talking with the other passengers about the activities below, what the search is about. Wondering if the zeppelins are safe to fly in the oceanic winds, and what the searchers are looking for...
 In the offices of a doctor or a hospital. A dark-haired, attractive woman is sitting on a lady's lap, pressing or massaging her side, recommending that she drink beer or water: some problem with her bladder holding water and so this woman is trying to massage it out of her. Jackie comes along. I notice both she and the patient are wearing the same outfit, a red-and-white striped miniskirt and halter top. Jackie spurns the suggested treatment and takes charge of the patient, leads her to an elevator while talking pleasantly to her...
 I notice in the doctor's office dozens of lizards in terrariums, horny toads and geckos, all sizes but none large, some scaly and some smooth; I hear someone say, "Ask for Purple Blues by name" (or some other kind of species name) as if they were a preferred product. I reach into the terrarium to touch them. In a back room in transparent cages are small mammals, guinea pigs and rabbits designated for medical tests. These are gruesome and strange: all the animals have obvious injuries or weird shunts and shaved patches of skin. A mother animal, asleep or doped up, seemed to have its infant sewn to a teat and her hind foot stuck into a drain tube...
 A large gathering of people, a tour or a class. I fall in love with a blonde woman there, the bittersweet feeling I had with Mary Overton, a feeling I'd forgotten but immediately recognize. Getting alone with her in what seems like a grassy park area, she is wearing a wet T-shirt and shorts; we lie down on the grass and I am touching her and saying how much I love her but the words get deflected somehow, they catch in my throat. Her wet face against mine, like Nancy. I want to open to her but I can't. She goes away with someone else...
 I am trying to talk with my mother and father but nothing comes out right. I say things in jest that upset or annoy them. I feel impatient when my mother pretends not to understand something. My father and I get in an argument about what the founding fathers really believed. I am full of inexplicable anger, I don't understand why I feel so angry just when everything is going so well for me...